I am not a shallow person.

Admittedly, there is a preference for physical appearance in a potential mate, a possible partner. After all, one does need that component of physical attraction for the relationship to be a successful one. At least I value it and I believe it to be a necessary part of a relationship with a significant other.

This comes from a place where I recently responded to an ad on craigslist. An individual craving intimate moments with another, caressing, cuddling, kissing. I responded because I miss those moments too. Haven't had them in a while and they are essential. Living life alone, as amaZing as it can be, in getting to know yourself personally and being comfortable with who you are and to not be governed by anything other than your body, your soul and your spirit, having someone to hold you, well, there's nothing like that in the solo life....

I was not attracted to this guy once he sent me his picture. There were other things too that sent red flags up during our email exchange. I am thankful with how I handled things. As mean as it may sound, it feels like I dodged a bullet and for that I am grateful. I have learned my lesson and will no longer respond to personal ads online.

Thought I'd share. Since, there is a line between shallowness and preference and I walk it on a regular basis, as I am sure many others do I figured it would be a good share.

The other day I went and got some free fish and chips at this joint downtown. I thought the owner was hott, like craZy/ bEautiful good looking. I didn't know him though, at all, I had never talked to the guy and so my assessment of his hotness was solely based on his looks. And it is easy to see those that are good looking (according to what one considers to be pretty, beautiful, gorgeous, cute, hot, sexy, handsome, rigged, ad infinitum) from the day-to-day. The thing is, is unless we speak to these vessels of Love, it is hard to really know how compatible their BEing is with ours, on ALL levels (sexually, spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally).

30 minutes earlier I had been oogling this guy on the streetcar, because he gave me a look prior to getting on, that read, "I want you!". And personally, I found him to be attractive, because of that look he gave me; rendering the raw, passionate, spontaneity a plausibility, but also, because of his demeanour, the colours he wore, what he wore, his overall look, everything about him was like.... fuck... I wanted to grab him, push him to the side and start making out with him. I mean this is based purely on lust, that's what physical attraction is, being drawn to someone because of what they look like.

And we do it on the regular.

Perhaps, this is my rectification for trying to feel less guilty for being attracted to a certain kind of guy.... But, I don't care... I have faith, belief and hope that the right person for me, will come into my life at the right time. The Universe is that Divinely perfect. Amen to that!